Hilarious Conversation With A Publisher: PUSH!

Happy Saturday!

If my fingers were walking down the interstate as I’ve typed on my computer this past week, I would be in California this morning! I consider myself to be the ultimate multitasker of the universe (besides God, of course), but this has been another whole new level of productivity! Honestly, without this new grace, last week would have taken any normal person 3 months or more!

Thank you God, for always making us whatever we need to be in the exact moment we need to be it! Wahoooooo!

One of the publishers I’ve been negotiating with has given me a projected release date of somewhere between June and September of next year. I can maybe make it till June, but I will burst into flames if I have to carry this message until September!

Really, the time frame they’ve given is customary… and the time would fly by fast with all the promotional stuff, and accumulating endorsements, and scheduling a Make Me A Legend speaking tour, and hosting pre-release parties, etc.

Yet, just like so many people, I am over-pregnant with purpose and I so badly want to give birth sooner than the birthing suite seems to be available. (photo above by Corie Marie)

Here is the message I sent to that companies publicist early this morning! Perhaps it will give you a laugh, or it will set you on fire!

Dear Lester Thompson (fictitious name), you’re amazing! Thank you for another heartfelt reply. Every time we communicate, the sparks fly for me! I’m praying for you this morning, thanking God for our developing partnership.

I guess, of everything we’ve discussed, the biggest factor in my mind concerning any publishing contract is how fast and widespread the publisher can launch my message into the earth.

I agree with you on the prophetic timing of God, and I definitely do not want to strive my way into a premature delivery. They used to call me Jacob, but on one dark night some time ago, I sent my family and friends, and all my possessions across the ford of Jabbok… and there, I was alone with God. I wrestled with Him until the break of day—and in that dark season of my life, God changed my name… (story built from Genesis 33:22-32)

I’m going to exaggerate slightly and give you and your lovely wife a delicious and entertaining Saturday morning breakfast in bed…

It’s very difficult for me to process another 11 months, when I have been writing for the past 5 years and editing myself crazy for at least the past 6 months. : )

Do me a favor. Close your eyes and picture a 9 month and 1 week (overdo) pregnant woman.

See her standing in front of you right now, Lester—she has her left hand on the back side of her left hip, as she carefully positions her right hand underneath the promised child of her overdue destiny, to leverage up her 50 pound belly. Now look up, and pay special attention to this woman’s conflicted face. Notice those faint groans and intermittent grunts. Look deep into her blood shot eyes…

Lester—I am that pregnant woman! And the only thing I can say right now is,

“Help! Dear God, get this thing out of me! You might not be finished up with that other routine prenatal appointment, and you might not be suited up and sterilized just yet… but I’m coming in for an emergency delivery! I hear you saying, ‘relax and breathe,’ but you see, this is not another one of those false alarms! I know I’ve cried wolf before and I’ve gotten everyone out of bed in the middle of the night, only to drive me back home in silent frustration… but these contractions are different from those other lesser contractions! This is it! We are having this child TONIGHT… Everybody UP! Call the publisher and tell him I’m on my way in, and if he doesn’t meet me at the birthing suite, then I will have it in the hallway… Oh God… will somebody shout PUSH with me right now! My legs are pushing so hard against these stirrups and my hands are gripped so tightly into these handle bars—my whole body is turning blue! Does anybody hear me right now?”

Shall I continue, Lester? I’m out of my mind, don’t you think? Haha.

Just thought you could use a good laugh this morning.


Do you feel just same as I do, about certain divine moments in your own life right now? I think I’m not alone! In fact, when I close my eyes I see in a vision… an entire hospital called The Birthing Suite Hospital! In every room there is another person in the stirrups and pushing! This seems to be a definite prophetic season.

Your thoughts?

Tomorrow morning at Destiny Family Center, I think we’re going to open a section of the balcony, a historical moment in this current awakening! Over the past few weeks, we’ve been dangerously close to running out of seats. More than 100 people have given their lives to Jesus over the past 5 weeks. An awareness of God is starting to envelop this whole community. Maybe we’ll see you tomorrow morning at 10am!

I just finished praying for you (with tremendous passion), hoping you really feel the difference. I wish you a most triumphant Saturday wherever you are in the earth today.

Please leave your comments here on the blog site so that we will always have a record of your beautiful thoughts.

With much love…

Dream Big, Live Bold, and Make the Difference!


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6 thoughts on “Hilarious Conversation With A Publisher: PUSH!

  1. Oh my goodness you have me laughing and snorting at the same time. I can only imagine the publisher's face as he/she reads your letter to them. Are you crazy…..yeah, but crazy with a purpose!!!!! I do pray that the publisher understands the urgency. We don't want you popping.

    I also pray that God's will be done and that the timing is perfect for the book to put on the shelves.

    Have a most glorious day!!!!

  2. Praying the best doctor(Publisher) is placed in your path and immediately does an ultra-sound (review) to determine the exact due date. This way you can rest assured knowing this birth will be the living, breathing miracle it was designed to be born for.

    As you know the lungs are the last to develop and those last few weeks are crucial so there is no question about needing life support. No struggle to breathe on its own. Timing is perfect as God designed. Alive and Life Changing!!!!!!

    PS… I can't wait either!!

  3. Thank you nuala!! Love you n Randy!

    Vickie! That comment is written like a professional sermonizer!!! Dear God, that will preach all day long!!! Wooo!!

  4. Wow Vickie what powerful visuals.

    You're welcome Chuck we love u and Em also!!!

    It wasn't too long ago that I blogged about Randy and I being overdue. You start to get antsy, then impatient, then content, and it is a cycle until bam it right there in front of your face. Then you are like wow it really happened. I think it is so crucial for us to jot down our thoughts before the process, during the process, and after the process. That way we can go back and Praise God all over again because once this book is published everyone will be like whoah it is published and selling like hotcakes, but the "feeling" of waiting for it to come to pass will fade and this is a precious stage…live it and take it all in because soon you will be published author with one busier schedule.

    I thank God today for Emily and her encouragement in your life and her patience during these 5 years for you to be able to write this book. It takes a secure and loving wife to be able to give up time with her husband for God to do His work in him and to complete His work in him and God made her that way!!!! I know Emily is your biggest cheerleader and I know she is going to beem with glory when all is said and done.

  5. Very well explained Nuala! What you said here makes me think about anticipation and the excitement we feel of the destination, the end result and so often we miss out on the journey itself. Like you said, if we journal our feelings we can look back and Praise God for all the moments in between.

    Sticking with the pregnancy scenario, we wait anxiously for the day our baby is born and as the due date approaches we are REALLY READY for this baby to be on the OUTSIDE of our body!

    I will never forget the feeling I felt the first time I left my last baby at home and went to the grocery store ALONE. After being put off work early for pre-term labor, Shianne and I spent a lot of "quality time" alone laying still to keep her inside of me. I noticed EVERY move she made. So that day at the store when I was no longer pregnant I felt very alone and very sad for a brief moment.

    God quickly reminded me I was exactly where I needed to be when I needed to be there and I savored every single moment and Shianne is living proof of all of that.

    Thanks Pastor! Glad you liked my post! You too Nuala!