Finding Great Mentors

Happy Wednesday!

This is a photo of Muhammad Ali and his great mentor/trainer Angelo Dundee. According to an article at The Telegraph

Angelo Dundee’s reputation was built firstly on Carmen Basilio – who won world titles at welterweight and middleweight – but then cemented with Muhammad Ali between 1960-81. Dundee was trainer in all but two of Ali’s 61 bouts, and he oversaw Ali becoming the first three-time world heavyweight champion. Looking back, they achieved the height of fame together. ”The kid was electric,” Dundee would say, calling Ali ‘the kid’ right until he passed away, at the age of 90. They were boxing’s most famous double act. But Dundee always admitted that fighters “make trainers.”

Everyone has the potential of going so much farther in life with the right mentors. Now think about your own life. Is there a key relationship that hasn’t fully developed… one that can definitely turn you into a three-time world champion at whatever it is that you do? YES! The answer is YES!

This is what I’m talking about in Make Me A Legend, Chapter 14:: Mentors, Peers, and Apprentices

In today’s world, mentors are also referred to as fathers, or coaches. Behind every aspiring apprentice is a dedicated mentor; behind every star player is a brilliant coach; behind every flourishing son and daughter is a loving father. Without these coverings, potential legends are left to themselves to struggle and fail far more than they can handle the pain. It’s sad that most neglected children burn out of the race long before they have a real chance at living their dreams. I honestly believe there is a covering crisis in our world today. Each generation gradually worsens. We are neglecting our young, and this sin is hurting us. I believe this is a primary source of social infection in every declining civilization.

I see a vision of our young—mentorless apprentices, coachless players, and parentless children. They lay at the feet of the elder generation with plenty of unrefined talent, not able to turn their talents into skills, lacking the confidence that comes from being covered—they are face-down in the dirt, waiting for the people above them to step up and cover them!

Listen, as they pray, “Dear God, please let me stand out to someone. Please give me a mentor—a coach—a father. I’m so weak and confused, and I don’t know what I’m doing, and nobody seems to care about that. Anytime someone promising comes along, all they seem to want from me is a trophy they can wave in front of their friends. Please send someone into my life who loves me like you do—someone who really wants to give their life for the acceleration of my purpose. Dear God, will you please inspire someone to cover me, before it’s too late?”

Yesterday, I began a conversation about mentorship… and it became a hot topic on twitter, Facebook, Google+, Linkedin, and this blog!

It seems that I’m right. People are praying and searching for synergistic relationships, more today than in recent years.

One lady asked me on twitter: What process would you recommend for finding a #mentor ?

Of course, I’ve written a whole chapter on the subject. Everyone should read Make Me A Legend as soon as possible, from chapter 1 - Beauty Is Sleeping, to chapter 17 - Untame Yourself. 

Here are a few more thoughts from my book about finding great mentors

Since God already wants you covered, He will make it happen when the time is perfect. Don’t get nervous, or obnoxious. Divine connections must form naturally. All you have to do is be yourself, and pay attention to the people you meet, the places you go, the friends you already have, and the friends of all your friends. Pay attention to everyone and everything. If you are yourself and pay attention long enough—before you know it, the sparks will fly!

I am not suggesting you sit at home and wait for your mentor to levitate his awesome self onto your front porch! Go ahead, be brave and test the waters. Put yourself out there, be vulnerable, and take a risk. Get out of the house, secretly interview people, hand out a few applications, and see what happens. Be very careful not to cave under the pressures of your unresolved insecurities and force yourself on the wrong person. Of course, you can always hire a life coach if you can afford it. Under the right circumstances, this is a very good option.

Whether your mentor is paid or volunteer, still you must wait for a chemical—better yet, a spiritual—reaction if you expect the relationship to last. Don’t ever settle for anything less than God’s mentor for your life. Find a mentor who will love you with a father’s heart. You deserve it.

Here is a great video about finding a great mentor from Jack Canfield, Author of Chicken Soup For The Soul

Let’s talk about this again today.

I just prayed for you.

Dream Big,

Chuck

Mentorship Happens By Accident, But Its Far More Effective When It’s Done On Purpose!

Happy Tuesday!

It’s 7am, I’m sitting in a starbucks at the moment, working on an outline for my second book, listening to elevation worship on youtube… I can feel God wrapping His arms around me in a very special way this morning. It’s really wild, like an outer body experience.

This room has switched into slow motion, and the sound has been muted… and I can see and hear every action, in comprehensive detail, from several angles.

A lady is eating her pastry and sipping coffee to my right, while her two adolescent girls seem thrilled to be drinking their kid sized tea’s.

There is an older fellow sitting straight across from me, reading the paper, but he seems to be in deep thought about something else.

To my far right, a 40 something male is reading his book.

Just walking in, a middle aged couple… he has an orange bow tie, she is wearing a red and white striped shirt.

She compliments him, “You look very handsome today.” He reciprocates with a smile and a softspoken, “Thank you.”

Behind the counter everyone is focused on the orders they’re processing, but chatting and laughing together about everything under the sun.

Speaking if the sun, it’s starting to shine through the window behind me. A lady just leaned over my right shoulder to adjust the blinds…

I’m praying for these people, that God will use my smile to bless them… that God will inspire others also, to show them His love today. I’m praying for their health, and for their relationships. Especially for those who are facing unbearable circumstances… that they will feel a new sense of hope, the warmth of God’s grace, just like the warmth of the sun on this Starbucks window.

[One Hour Later]

Well, my phone rang, so I answered it… and I just finished with the most electrifying life coaching call of my past few years.

It’s been a very long time since I felt like my strategic questions and suggestions were going to CHANGE EVERYTHING on that level, for a highly capable individual like that young man. I’m in tears about this, in the middle of this Starbucks, with people looking at my face and wondering why?

So many times, I’ve invested my whole heart, and everything I have… to help a young Joshua RISE to the heights, and fly with the eagles. I’ve been very careful not to take ownership of these apprentices. I’ve encouraged them with my words, served them with my selfless actions, and inspired them with a life well lived. I’ve modeled what it is to be a good husband, father, friend, and follower of Christ. But, inevitably, it happens to the greatest mentors… loyalty is broken by [seemingly] more attractive options… the apprentice finds a way to disqualify the mentor… and the apprentice moves on.

This is the reason behind my tears. Mentorship is happening again, but this time there are more apprentices than ever before. Here is the text conversation I had with the young man from this morning, following our historical phone call:

Me: That call was electrifying!! Thanks for giving my life so much meaning. I just prayed for you. Have a beautiful day. Succeed above your peers at everything you do. God is with you.

Young Man: DUDE!!! Thank you so much! I am so stinking excited right now! I can’t wait to get home and talk to my wife tonight.

Me: I get tears in my eyes when I think about how happy I am to have you guys in my life. I’ve been let down by so many hopefuls over the past ten years. You show so much promise. You were born to change the world… and I pray that God will always give me the privilege of covering you, protecting you, encouraging you, and helping you to succeed on the highest possible level. I never want to own you, just bless you, and live with the satisfaction of knowing I had a small part in helping you RISE!

Young Man: I feel like other than my mom while I was growing up, you are the first person to do that for me. From the bottom of my heart thank you .

Can you see why I’m so moved at the moment?

Be inspired to pay better attention to the mentors and apprentices in your own life from now. Is there a person who is laying down his or her life to help you rise? Is there a young apprentice, who is hoping you will recognize his or her potential, and give your whole heart and everything you have to help them fly like an eagle?

Mentorship happens by accident, but its far more effective when it’s done on purpose!

Today’s footprint’s image from Tumbr.

I just prayed for you, that God will bless your relationships with others… that He will produce an abundance of fruit in you and through you this year. Synergy is a powerful force. With the right people in our lives, we can go innately faster and farther than we can alone.

I thank God for you.

With much love,

Chuck

Ps: Today’s message corresponds perfectly with chapter 14 of my book, Make Me A Legend. Check it out!

This Is Your Turning Point!

Happy Saturday!

Every few days, I like to scroll through my book and pick out a few paragraphs that really speak to me. Here’s what speaks to me this morning…

Make Me A Legend 

Chapter 6: Hurry Up and Find Rock Bottom

Hovering Over Rock Bottom In The Pigs Pen

Isn’t it sad and ironic to think about how much God loves us, and how we spend so much of our lives running and hiding from Him? Why do we muscle through our days in human strength, only turning to God when we have nowhere else to turn? Why do we make Him our last resort? Why?

We live in a time when anyone claiming a close relationship with God is shunned as a “religious fanatic.” This modern world makes it seem as if the only people who actually use the Bible as their guiding light are the Jesus freaks. It’s like we’re telling God to leave us alone so we can live as we see best, without having a responsibility to some heavenly Father. Take a look at the beautiful story Jesus used for describing this insanity:

To illustrate the point further, Jesus told them this story: “A man had two sons. The younger son told his father, ‘I want my share of your estate now, instead of waiting until you die.’ So his father agreed to divide his wealth between his sons. A few days later this younger son packed all his belongings and took a trip to a distant land, and there he wasted all his money on wild living.

About the time his money ran out, a great famine swept over the land, and he began to starve. He persuaded a local farmer to hire him to feed his pigs. The boy became so hungry that even the pods he was feeding the pigs looked good to him. But no one gave him anything. [Tough love] …When he finally came to his senses, he said to himself, ‘At home even the hired men have food enough to spare, and here I am, dying of hunger! I will go home to my father and say, “Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant”’” (Luke 15:11-19).

Can you see why this message was, and still is, such an important message from Jesus? Millions of people who have never heard about Jesus have heard His story of the Prodigal Son. I think it’s so popular because everyone has served time in the pig pen, haven’t we?

Of course, not everyone in the mud is perceptibly trudging around in some extreme state of human deprivation. There is a vast sea of prodigals who seem to have their lives together—living in nice homes, driving nice cars, and having nice careers—while the real truth is that they’re torn to pieces on the inside. No matter how successful we become in this world, nothing ever truly satisfies when our connection with the Father is broken.

Almost every day, I see people who are worn down with hard life in the pig pen. Some of them have spent so much time in the mire they’ve started to oink, grunt, and squeal at their own reflection. Their weather-beaten hides are bone dry and callus-covered—coarse, like sandpaper. They look thirty years older than they are. In a haze of misery, herds of these history-maker hopefuls drift into the wastelands with very little chance of return. They stopped liking themselves a long time ago; their dignity is shredded, and they feel like they have nothing and nobody to live for.

God forbid that you’re up to your neck in the slop right now, reduced to a fraction of the amazing person you once were or could be, gasping for your life under the unbearable consequences of a big series of wrong moves. I’ve seen this happen so many times to so many people. Nobody ever plans a trip to rock bottom. Everyone gets there while trying to go somewhere else.

The Turning Point

Once you’ve really been there, you will always remember rock bottom as the Eden of your re-creation! Even though right now you may be gasping for air, only a few seconds from flat lining your way into eternity, rock bottom is a wormhole in the core of hell that transports the dead back into the land of the living.

While rock bottom will always be the low mark of your life, it is so much more—rock bottom is the starting location for your next exciting journey. So no matter how bad things might be going in your life right now, go ahead and free your heart to hope again! This moment is the end of your life as it has been to this point, but it need not be the end of you. Change your perspective! Be optimistic about all the suffering you’re going through, for this can be the start of something wonderful—it can be all upward from here, if you just do the right thing at rock bottom.

In my own life, I’ve been shocked with how fast God can shift the momentum back in my favor. It’s nothing for God to work a 24-hour miracle! It doesn’t matter how far down you’ve fallen; if you’re serious about returning home, this is the moment when God steps in like a superhero to the rescue. He’s been waiting for this moment all your life, and here it is! Father is livid with your enemies! He’s been anticipating the rock-bottom prayers you’re now praying. He’s never forced Himself on you before today, but if you’ll open your heart, He’ll rush in like a gale-force wind! Open the doors and windows as wide as possible—let the fresh, spring air in! This is a new season in your life!

Swooping down out of nowhere, it would seem, with His bare hands He will tear apart everything that has been making you cry. Stop trembling in fear! You’re safe now. You’ve come under the omnipotent protection of God. Just reach out and take your Father’s hand. Be still for a moment and let Him have a look at you. God specializes in fixing broken people and shattered circumstances. God is the restorer of broken dreams and the giver of new ones! No broken person is broken beyond repair. Every person is fixable! Yes, God can fix you!

I’m listing to the following video and praying specially for all those who are nearing rock bottom… for the first time or the hundredth time. I’m praying for your miracle, for your sudden rise from the ashes, and for your happily ever after.

With so much love,

Chuck

Ps: click here to order your signed copy of Make Me A Legend!

Everyone Needs Mercy

Make Me A Legend

Chapter 15: Bow Lower As You Climb Higher

Beware, The Angry Mobs 

Every time a high-profile person collapses, I feel their pain like it is happening to my family and me. I am not one to churn out the jokes, or shove the strugglers down to hell. While the newscasters, talk show hosts, and self-righteous church folks mock and jeer and hiss and boo for months to years, I fall down on my face in intercession for these humiliated people and their suffering families. I pray for fallen people, no matter how hideously they have transgressed, oftentimes with a river of tears, that God will bend down in His great mercy and nurse them back to life. In what is thought to be the oldest book of the New Testament, James recorded:

Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom, because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs over judgment (James 2:12-13 NIV).

Merciless people outrage me, when they so arrogantly sidestep their own failures to “expose” a broken person. One self-righteous person gets a taste of blood, then another, and a few more—and in a matter of seconds, a mob is formed. It is one of my highest life goals: to never lead an angry mob or join one. I never want there to be any mistake about my position. I will never endorse a mob with my spineless neutrality. If you’re a bully, you’ll be no friend of mine.

I never want to point my finger in judgment when someone is failing. I never want to kick a knocked down person. If I can’t help, then I will pray. I will search the depths of my own heart. In the fear of God, I will keep on telling myself, Chuck, you have no idea what kind of pressure that person was under that led to such a failure. And Chuck, if you even think for a minute this could never happen to you, then think again; you have never known that degree of satanic solicitation, the kind of pressure and erosion that person has faced these past years. Someday, soon enough, you will have your shot. Someday, you will stand on their mountain. In that day, you will see how much more violently the wind blows up there. So, don’t brag because you are doing so well these days. You are just facing a few diaper demons, and look at how easily they still slap you around at times.

God told Jeremiah, “If racing against mere men makes you tired, how will you race against horses? If you stumble and fall on open ground, what will you do in the thickets near the Jordan?” (Jer. 12:5). This is why I hope you will read and re-read Make Me a Legend Chapters 9 and 10 and build your extravagant foundation. This is why you need to grow slowly. You have to master the footmen before graduating to the horses. You have to crawl to each next level on your knees, knowing that it’s violent at the top. If you do not ascend in grace and humility, then you will be crushed with what lies ahead.

I remember so clearly what I was thinking when I wrote these paragraphs. I actually teared up several times, thinking about all of the broken people in our world who in their life’s darkest moments, were kicked down instead of helped up.

Let us decide today, that we will always show mercy. Let’s love the fallen, and be God’s agent of healing several times each week.

Look around, there are broken people in every direction. The modern world has become colder, far more heartless, and judgmental.

This just means that you and I are more needed than ever in our lifetime. We can save lives with God’s love. I’ve done it before, and I bet you have to. People need us to nurse them back to life.

Maybe, you’ve been kicked on the ground for a strand of big mistakes. God wants to bring you back to life. No matter what you’ve done, He wants to show you the depths of His mercy.

This Sunday, at our DFC Vision Twenty12/17 presentation, I will be revealing our 14 Core Values. Here is one of them:

Don’t forget where you came from, everyone needs MERCY.
-Reference: Luke 10:37

Your thoughts?

Here is a great video for this moment. Elevation Worship, All Things New

I just prayed for you, like I do every morning. Have a beautiful day.

With much love,

Chuck

Ps: click here to order your signed copy of Make Me A Legend!

Everyone Starts Alone

Happy Friday,

Today, I wanted to share with you a tremendous thought from my book…

Make Me A Legend

Chapter 11 :: Celebrate Your Progress

Becoming Your Own Best Fan

In the fourth chapter of Philippians, Paul wrote about his early years of ministry when only one fan church financially supported him. Paul (who was named Saul at the time) said:

As you know, you Philippians were the only ones who gave me financial help when I first brought you the Good News and then traveled on from Macedonia. No other church did this (Philippians 4:15).

Can you imagine, a man who influenced the world as much as Apostle Paul, started out with an empty stadium? He most certainly did. In the Book of Acts, we see how a man named Barnabas stuck his neck out to vouch for Saul—before anybody else trusted him. (Saul was Paul’s name, prior to his God encounter.) Barnabas, whose name means son of encouragement, was Saul’s first fan!

Saul’s preaching became more and more powerful, and the Jews in Damascus couldn’t refute his proofs that Jesus was indeed the Messiah. After a while some of the Jews plotted together to kill him. They were watching for him day and night at the city gate so they could murder him, but Saul was told about their plot. So during the night, some of the other believers lowered him in a large basket through an opening in the city wall. When Saul arrived in Jerusalem, he tried to meet with the believers, but they were all afraid of him. They did not believe he had truly become a believer! Then Barnabas brought him to the apostles and told them how Saul had seen the Lord on the way to Damascus and how the Lord had spoken to Saul. He also told them that Saul had preached boldly in the name of Jesus in Damascus (Acts 9:22-27).

Before the world loves you, it may loathe you for a decade or two. Before people understand you, they may misinterpret even your purest intentions. Some people may even devote the major portion of their lives to bringing you down, thinking they are doing a great service to God for shutting you up. Jesus spoke of this in John 16:2 when He said, “For you will be expelled from the synagogues, and the time is coming when those who kill you will think they are doing a holy service for God.”

I speak from experience when I tell you that the more deeply you care about these people, the more it will hurt. Dealing with this degree of rejection will shatter your heart to tiny pieces, sending you to bed many nights feeling worthless and alone.

As soon as you start to advertise your vision, most everyone will think you have lost your mind. Even if they don’t say it out loud, they may think it. Familiarity breeds contempt. Prophets are usually without honor in their hometowns (see Luke 4:24). Even some of your closest pals will not be able to wait out your long season of small beginnings. This is not brought up as a condemning verdict over your family and friends; it is just a universal glitch of humanity.

No matter how hard we try, most people have to see tangible success before they can cheer. Think about this on a personal level. I bet you didn’t select your favorite sports team during a ten-year slump. No, you purchased your season tickets during the build-up of a huge winning streak. Sometimes, one good year is all it takes to get us in the stands and keep us there for life; sometimes it’s not. Little by little, enduring teams inevitably recruit and retain more fans than they turn away and their stadiums get fuller and louder until there is not a single empty seat.

Anyone can succeed when all they have to do is show up and ride to glory on the dynamism of a sold-out stadium. Since it does take time to recruit frenzied fans, you will need to master the art of becoming your own best fan. This is where legends seem to have an edge over others. They can feel positively about what they are doing long before anyone else appreciates it. Legends look far beyond their early days of unpopularity to the time when they have blessed the earth and people have benefited from their generous bequest.

I titled this blog, “Everyone Starts Alone,” because it’s true. If you’re in the early phases of your development, or even well advanced in years and experience… and you cannot figure out why it’s taking so long to get the wrong people off the bus, the right people on the bus, and the right people on the bus in the right seats… just know that if you really want to make a lasting difference in the world, then you will walk alone sometimes… usually longer than you want to.

In those moments, draw near to God. He is near to the lonely and brokenhearted. He has promised to never leave you nor forsake you. He is near.

I just finished praying for you this morning.

With much love,

Chuck Balsamo

Ps: click here to order your signed copy of Make Me A Legend!